There are many great reasons to have your children close together:
- Shared experiences like playtime, naps etc
- Close developmental stages (and shared toys)
- Getting through the tougher stages (broken sleep) in one go
- More offers of help, because your friends and family haven’t burned out either!
However, there are definitely challenges and here’s The Maternity Nurse Company guide to overcoming them with style.
Coping with the birth
Whether you’re going into hospital or aiming for a home birth, it’s likely you’ll have a friend or family member taking care of your toddler when you go into labour. It’s important that your toddler feels happy and confident around that person, so no matter how much your mum or sister thinks they should be in charge, make sure you’ve chosen somebody who will make your little one feel both safe and special.
Show and tell
If you want to be the person who tells your toddler about the new arrival, make sure you’ve told all family members that this is your plan, so nobody spills the beans in advance.
And when you do introduce your newborn to your toddler, have no expectations. It may be a big deal to you, but to your toddler this is just another of the strange things that happen in the world, and they may appear bored, or upset or make a joke of the occasion, all of which are natural responses and aren’t indicators of how well they will get along in future!
Preparation, preparation, preparation
There’s a lot you can do before your new baby arrives: cook and freeze meals, make a rota of friends who will come and help out, design a schedule that minimises disruption to your toddler and get them used to it beforehand, plan a period of time every day when your toddler will have you to themselves as they used to before the baby arrived.
While not all of these plans will work out, having them in mind can help you structure the transition in a way that doesn’t exhaust you.
Lower your expectations
You are going to be tired, and the house may look a mess for a few weeks and that’s absolutely fine. Your focus should be sleeping, eating and enjoying and everything else can become background noise for a while. Of course, it’s important not to abandon other elements entirely and having a maternity nurse can help keep the meaningful aspects of your life in a good balance.
Never refuse help
Even if you don’t need it, if you’ve got a list of tasks people can help with, then you’ll be able to let you friends and family feel useful and get quality stuff done without having to stretch your tired brain to think about what needs doing.
Enjoy!
Photo creds: Nicolette Attree at Pexels